Have you ever wondered what it would have been like to participate in a pivotal point in history? What what it have been like as a conductor on the Underground Railroad? Have you ever wondered how the ancient pyramids were constructed? Write about what it would have been like for you.
As an introvert, I don’t feel I am at a disadvantage most times. I have grown to love my introversion and do not view it as a hindrance, but when you are in a situation where you are you must work with mostly extroverts those advantages don’t seem to put you in a favorable position.
Working with extroverts, especially those who try to for you out of your introversion can be difficult. Most of the work activities are stirred toward forced social interaction, team-building, and all things that they may enjoy, but we find uncomfortable and tiring. It can be challenging to be an introvert in those situations. I have found some ways to cope with them. Sometimes they work and sometimes they don’t. When they do, it is a win-win for all involved. Below are some of the tips I have used in the past.
Offer to do the planning and the setup.
I love to plan. Planning an event is never a problem for me. It’s attending the event that sparks my anxiety. That anxiety is exacerbated by the idea that everyone will thing I am antisocial or unwilling to participate because my energy will drain and I will begin to power down in the middle of the event. If I become heavily involved in the planning, I can still participate in my own way and often alone. I can also busy myself with the setup and thus avoid any sustained interaction.
Find another introvert
I call this the magnet method. The introvert is easy to spot. Search all corners of the room and that is where you will find us. Generally introverts who understand each other are content with congregating together and not socializing.
Excuse yourself ahead of time
If you are not on company time, it is perfectly fine to have other plans they will cut into the event. When you feel your energy start to drain, leave. It works well to have something planned ahead of time so everyone can be prepared for your departure.
As I mentioned, these tips don’t always work for every situation, but they can ease some of the introvert’s anxiety. The main thing is not to feel guilty for using these or any other coping strategies. We are who we are and we cannot help that.
There are some things we have to leave in the past if we want to have a different future.
That is a lesson that has taken me years to learn. We can get so comfortable with past experiences that we make them our present and our future.
Many of us have lived through a tragedy, had our hearts broken, or been mistreated. There is no reason to keep reliving those horrible moments. Certainly those experiences have shaped the people we are today, but they don’t have to shape us in a negative way. We should view those experiences as learning moments.
We often use past traumatic experiences to excuse our present behavior, but the only reason these past experience continue to affect us is because we continue to reach into the past and bring them to the surface. If you have ever uttered the words “I am like this because_________happened to me a long time ago”, you are guilty of allowing past experience to shape your present life. Stop creating issues and focus on healing and moving forward. Learn from those experiences and make better choices for yourself.
If you were ever in a relationship with a dishonest person, don’t create trust issues. Make better decisions on who you share your life with. If you grew up in a household where accountability and responsibility were nonexistent and you can recognize that, don’t allow that to be your excuse to continue that pattern. I admit that not everyone who exhibits a certain negative behavior is aware of the reason, but for those of us who like to blame current behavior on past experiences, we know exactly what we are doing. We know there was a problem in the past. Let’s leave it behind and move forward.
It is great to form good habits. It is also important to have habits that serve a purpose.
I believe in the law of attraction, particularly in your thoughts. There is biblical scripture about it as well. There are some things that I do to enforce that. I have a few tips that I feel keep my thoughts positive.
Life is unpredictable and there will be days that will challenge you. Everyday won’t be perfect, but it is important to not allow your thoughts to linger in a dark place. Often I use a few little reminders to keep my thoughts positive.
I like to make my passwords means something to me as a little reminder of something I want to accomplish or a goal I have set for myself. It could also be the name of a country you have always wanted to visit as a reminder to yourself to plan for your dream vacation. As you will be logging in many different devices and/or programs, this is a perfect opportunity to repetitively introduce positive language into your mind.
I love journaling. It is a way to organize your thoughts, brainstorm ideas, or just doodle and have fun. I have a daily gratitude journal and I write down the things I am thankful for in it. It is small enough to carry with me, so when something happens that I am particularly thankful for, I write it down.
Public Displays of Intention
I love inspirational quotes. I display them in my office and in my home, but I don’t like for them to be completely obvious to everyone else. Sometime I display them in different languages or in some code that only I can understand, but they serve a purpose for me. They remind me to keep my goals in mind throughout the day and to stay positive.
The most important thing is to have periodic reminders to ourselves to not only look for the positive in all things, but to not lose sight of our goal and to to be in a constant state of gratitude and growth.
This is a new season, and in order for you to rise higher, you have to break away from relationships that are limiting you. Sometimes in order to embrace the destiny God has in store, you have to be willing to make some difficult changes in your life. You have to be willing to examine…
Boo was a energetic kid who defied all odds, but his birth defect didn’t slow him down. From time to time Boo had to stay over to his great grandparents house because his parents worked long shifts. Naturally Boo’s great-grandmother was over protective but Boo wasn’t having it. During the 70s Tarzan was a big show on tv and a lot of kids tried to mimic Tarzan swinging from vine to vine. Long story short, you know Boo had to try swinging from a rope in a tall oak tree and somehow his right ankle got tangled up and he was hanging upside down calling for help. Frantically his grandmother ran to the tree when she heard his cries for help and was able to cut him down. Let’s just say Tarzan was grounded from that day forward, more ways than one…😂
There are so many ideas and beliefs that have been programmed into us. We don’t usually realize how little influence we have had on our own lives. We have been shaped by our environment. I have experienced it and seen in in others. I used to wonder how fascinating it was to see families, generation after generation repeat the same life patterns. For instance, there is a family in my town of football stars. As far back as my mother’s generation, that family produced star football players. Every year a young man from that family is on the local news for their skills on the football field. People say that football is in their blood, but is it more than that? Is it more than genetics? Is it programming? Could it be possible that that family’s influence has altered the DNA of each member and programmed those skills into each person?
I often wondered how every member of that family seemed to love football. Why didn’t one of them choose art or excel in something other than football? Were they born with that ability? It is just something to think about, but I would like to expand on how our environments have shaped us.
My mother was a teenage mom. She was a very good mom, but she had me at a young age. Growing up I became friends with a group of girls who were also children of teenage moms. By the time were had graduated high school, every girl in that group, except me, had had a child during or immediately after high school. They too became teenage moms. Not only that, their daughters also became teenage moms. One would think that those young women, because of their circumstances, were bound to that fate. That is not the case.
I wondered what it was about me that rescued me from the generational cycle of teenage pregnancy. I still can’t put my finger on it, but I do remember that I knew I was not going to be a teenage mother. I knew that was not going to happen to me. I did not know how my life was going to be, but I did not see being a mother in my teenage years fitting into any plan I had. I just knew it in my gut. On the other hand, my friends, as soon as they in high school began taking birth control. Their mothers insisted on it. I did not. You would think with all of that added medically prescribed protection from pregnancy those girls would have been saved from what seems to be a generational curse. Nope. They all became pregnant. I think the difference in their situation and mine was that their mothers constantly and relentlessly drilled in their heads that they were not going to get pregnant. I believe in doing so, they placed an nagging and persistent program into their minds that gave them laser focus on that very thing. Is it possible that focus attracted a certain outcome?
I truly feel I did not follow the same path because I was not programmed into thinking that was a looming possibility. I remember hearing my mother’s friends telling her she needed to talk to me soon as I was getting older and of that age when girls can “get in trouble”. For whatever reason, that talk never came. Instead she talked to me about going to college and how much fun that would be. We talked a lot about my future, but my future did not come with warnings. She did not fill my head with possibilities of me “getting in trouble”. I wasn’t placed on birth control as a precaution. I was simply left to be.
Some people would say that my mother’s unwillingness to bombard me with talk of teenage pregnancy was irresponsible. I say it was effective. I would like all of us to think about the things in our lives that we feel are inevitable and to really think about why we feel that way. Have we been programmed? If so, we can rewrite the program. We are not bound to certain outcomes. We are in control of our own lives. The past does not dictate the future.