Posted in Uncategorized, Write On Wednesday

Write on Wednesday #63

Today’s Writing Prompt:  Rewrite History

Have you ever wondered what it would have been like to participate in a pivotal point in history?  What what it have been like as a conductor on the Underground Railroad?  Have you ever wondered how the ancient pyramids were constructed?  Write about what it would have been like for you.

Posted in Introvert Lounge

Social Distancing

 

Fortunately, I am able to work from home.  These next few weeks will be interesting. Many have joked how us introverts have been prepared for times such as this.  I am wishing all of you well and for those who have fallen ill, I wish a speedy and complete recovery.  God bless!

Posted in Introvert Lounge, Uncategorized

Introverts and Socializing at Work

As an introvert, I don’t feel I am at a disadvantage most times. I have grown to love my introversion and do not view it as a hindrance, but when you are in a situation where you are you must work with mostly extroverts those advantages don’t seem to put you in a favorable position.

Working with extroverts, especially those who try to for you out of your introversion can be difficult. Most of the work activities are stirred toward forced social interaction, team-building, and all things that they may enjoy, but we find uncomfortable and tiring. It can be challenging to be an introvert in those situations. I have found some ways to cope with them. Sometimes they work and sometimes they don’t. When they do, it is a win-win for all involved. Below are some of the tips I have used in the past.

 

Offer to do the planning and the setup.

I love to plan.  Planning an event is never a problem for me.  It’s attending the event that sparks my anxiety.  That anxiety is exacerbated by the idea that everyone will thing I am antisocial or unwilling to participate because my energy will drain and I will begin to power down in the middle of the event. If I become heavily involved in the planning, I can still participate in my own way and often alone.  I can also busy myself with the setup and thus avoid any sustained interaction.  

 

Find another introvert

I call this the magnet method.  The introvert is easy to spot.  Search all corners of the room and that is where you will find us.  Generally introverts who understand each other are content with congregating together and not socializing.  

 

Excuse yourself ahead of time

If you are not on company time, it is perfectly fine to have other plans they will cut into the event.  When you feel your energy start to drain, leave.  It works well to have something planned ahead of time so everyone can be prepared for your departure.

 

As I mentioned, these tips don’t always work for every situation, but they can ease some of the introvert’s anxiety.  The main thing is not to feel guilty for using these or any other coping strategies. We are who we are and we cannot help that.

 

Posted in Think About it Thursday

Renewal

 

Soon it will be spring and with it comes thoughts of things starting anew.  Along with the blooms and pastels there will be new beginnings.  Some mark this change of season with cleaning house from top to bottom.  I usually don’t follow such customs, but this spring I am committed to a renewal.

Are there things that you need to renew?  Are there any slates that should be wiped clean and a new story written in its stead?  Let’s use this upcoming spring to start something afresh.

 

Posted in Tea Talk Tuesday, Think About it Thursday, Uncategorized

Just Leave it Behind

There are some things we have to leave in the past if we want to have a different future.

That is a lesson that has taken me years to learn.  We can get so comfortable with past experiences that we make them our present and our future.

Many of us have lived through a tragedy, had our hearts broken, or been mistreated.  There is no reason to keep reliving those horrible moments.  Certainly those experiences have shaped the people we are today, but they don’t have to shape us in a negative way.  We should view those experiences as learning moments.

We often use past traumatic experiences to excuse our present behavior, but the only reason these past experience continue to affect us is because we continue to reach into the past and bring them to the surface.  If you have ever uttered the words “I am like this because_________happened to me a long time ago”, you are guilty of allowing past experience to shape your present life.  Stop creating issues and focus on healing and moving forward.  Learn from those experiences and make better choices for yourself.

If you were ever in a relationship with a dishonest person, don’t create trust issues.  Make better decisions on who you share your life with.  If you grew up in a household where accountability and responsibility were nonexistent and you can recognize that, don’t allow that to be your excuse to continue that pattern.  I admit that not everyone who exhibits a  certain negative behavior is aware of the reason, but for those of us who like to blame current behavior on past experiences, we know exactly what we are doing.  We know there was a problem in the past.  Let’s leave it behind and move forward.

Posted in Introvert Lounge

Introvert Cloak

It seems that everywhere I turn there is mention of introversion.  As an introvert I don’t throw the term around loosely and I don’t like when other do.  In particular, I don’t like it when being antisocial, boring, or nastily sarcastic is associated with introversion.  I love people and am a generally pleasant person.  I love being around people too, but I get my fill of socializing quicker than others.  I will admit I won’t seek out heavily populated social events.  I much rather attend a symphony, recital, or a play.  I tend to choose events I don’t have to play an active roll in.  That’s it.  If i spend too much time socializing, I’m worn out.  My social butterfly wings will quit mid-flight leaving me searching for a quiet, solitary place to land.  Before that energy wears out, you would never guess that I am an introvert, but I am and that’s okay.

What is not okay is behaving poorly and then throwing on the introvert cloak. Below is a list of qualities often associated with introverts that drive me crazy.

 

 

Introverts don’t like people

Yes we do. I hate this association the most because I love people.  I think this has been associated with introvert because we tend to “give out” and retreat a social functions.  I understand it can be confusing to see a person jolly and having a wonderful time then turn into someone who can’t get out of the room fast enough.  That is because we have used up our energy.  We all can turn on the charm and enthusiasm, but it has a limited shelf life. That does not mean we don’t enjoy spending time with people.  It just means that time does indeed get spent.

 

Introverts are snarky

Okay…I can be snarky, but it is not a part of my personality.  One thing I can say about most introverts I know is that we are quite witty.  If the situation calls for snark, it is best served by us.  I think our ability to think through things before opening our mouths give is that extra biting edge when  the need for a snarky remark presents itself.

Introverts like to hide in the shadows

This is only partially true.  We will go hide in the shadows when our energy reserves wear out, but we do not live there.  We enjoy the light as much as anyone else.

 

Introverts are not great public speakers

I have to speak in public all the time and it does not bother me at all.  I actually prefer speaking in front of a large group as opposed to mingling within a large group.  Introversion is not a lack of ability to function.  We just do things differently.

 

Introverts do not want friends

We do want friends, just not too many.  We usually have a small circle of close friends.  I am always looking to make new connections, but constant hanging out and doing lots of things together very often does not appeal to me.  My close circle of friends understand that or they are introverts as well.  It takes someone who really understands an introvert to be friends with one.  I often want to be in the company of my friends without necessarily interacting with them.  This is one of the things some of my extroverted friends do not understand.  I often hear “Why did you suggest I come over if we weren’t going to do anything?”  My response to that is “I just wanted to spend some time with you” , and I do. It doesn’t necessarily mean we have to do something.  Introverts are fine with just being.

 

What are some other misconceptions about introverts that drive you mad?

 

Posted in Write On Wednesday

Write on Wednesday #62

 

Today’s Writing Prompt: Road Trip!

I really don’t have any memorable road trips that were taken just for the reason of having a road trip.  My trips usually have a specific purpose like a visit or to attend an event. I have always wanted to just jump  in the car to no particular destination.  I would love to take a few weeks of just traveling to see the country.

For today’s writing prompt, write about an epic road trip.  Get very detailed.  Who will go with you?  What will pack?  What vehicle will you drive?  For how long will you be traveling?

Have fun with it. Maybe it will inspire you to make it a reality.

Posted in Think About it Thursday

Check Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself

We all let things slide, put things off, procrastinate.  There are some things that we really need to take care of before it’s too late.  This post was inspired by the “I don’t know who this is for” memes I see in many social media posts. I thought it would be a good idea to turn this post into a friendly reminder for all of us to take care of those things that we tend to put off.

iBourgie’s List of Things That May Need Your Attention

  1. Get a new toothbrush
  2. Change your air filters
  3. How old is your makeup? (Seriously, I don’t wear makeup often and I am certain I have had the same foundation for over a year.)
  4. Dust (I can’t remember the last time I did this)
  5. Cancel that free trial!
  6. Do you have any useless subscriptions? Cancel them!
  7. That ugly sweater that Aunt So and So gave you five years ago, donate it! She’s never seen you in it anyway.
  8. Throw all the stuff your ex gave you away.
  9. If you have a hope chest, start using that stuff now.
  10. Clean your belly button.  It’s a lint trap
Posted in Write On Wednesday

Write on Wednesday #61

 

Today’s Writing Prompt: What do you want to be when you grow up?

 

I recognize that many of you who will be reading this post are probably already grownups.  I work in higher education and I often ask the young adults I counsel, “What to you want to be when you grow up?”  We often have ideas of how certain jobs lack financial stability or may not live up to the expectations of others.  Many of us have had careers for many years, but there was that one thing or job that you always wanted to have.  A dream job.

For this writing prompt, write about your dream job.  What would you daily activities be?  How would your life be different? Who knows, you may be inspired to take a leap of faith and follow your dreams.

Posted in Tea Talk Tuesday, Uncategorized

Attraction in Action

It is great to form good habits.  It is also important to have habits that serve a purpose.

I believe in the law of attraction, particularly in your thoughts.  There is biblical scripture about it as well.  There are some things that I do to enforce that.  I have a few tips that I feel keep my thoughts positive.

Life is unpredictable and there will be days that will challenge you.   Everyday won’t be perfect, but it is important to not allow your thoughts to linger in a dark place.  Often I use a few little reminders to keep my thoughts positive.

Persuasive Passwords

I like to make my passwords means something to me as a little reminder of something I want to accomplish or a goal I have set for myself.  It could also be the name of a country you have always wanted to visit as a reminder to yourself to plan for your dream vacation.  As you will be logging in many different devices and/or programs, this is a perfect opportunity to repetitively introduce positive language into your mind.

Gratitude Journal

I love journaling.  It is a way to organize your thoughts, brainstorm ideas, or just doodle and have fun.  I have a daily gratitude journal and I write down the things I am thankful for in it.  It is small enough to carry with me, so when something happens that I am particularly thankful for, I write it down.

Public Displays of Intention

I love inspirational quotes.  I display them in my office and in my home, but I don’t like for them to be completely obvious to everyone else.  Sometime I display them in different languages or in some code that only I can understand, but they serve a purpose for me.  They remind me to keep my goals in mind throughout the day and to stay positive.

 

The most important thing is to have periodic reminders to ourselves to not only look for the positive in all things, but to not lose sight of our goal and to to be in a constant state of gratitude and growth.