Posted in Uncategorized, Write On Wednesday

Write on Wednesday #55

 

Today’s Writing Prompt:  Your Most Embarrassing Moment

Do you recall a time when you were so embarrassed you thought you would never recover from it?  Write about it.  Describe what happened, the reactions you noticed, and how you felt.  You can even write about how you would have liked to prevent it or rectify the embarrassment.

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Posted in Good Stuff

Your Crown

 

by Achille DevÈria, printed by FranÁois Le Villain, published by Edward Bull, published by Edward Churton, after Unknown artist, hand-coloured lithograph, 1830s

 

No matter how one feels about monarchy, one must admit there continues to be a fascination with royalty.  We use it in our everyday speech as a compliment.  I often hear “Good morning, Queen!” from a nice young man when I am dressed fashionably or a “I hear you, Queen!” when I say something intelligent or witty.  Last week, my cousin used “Queen” to describe me.  I then told him my crown was bought and paid for.  I just had to start wearing it.  In my reply, I realized that although I was in possession of a crown, I had not been wearing it.  This caused me to examine why.

It has been always been my belief that we all have crowns. I think deep down most people feel this is the case, but do we walk around on a daily basis like royalty?  I didn’t.  People were seeing it in me, I feel it is there, but I was not wearing my crown.  When I was younger, I was known as the smart kid, teachers pet, and all those things that go along with being a bright student.  Although it was a good thing, this caused me to be teased by other students.  Being the smart kid wasn’t the popular thing to be.  So I took off my crown.  It started with self-deprecating humor and dumbing myself down to be what I thought to be more acceptable.  As I got older, being smart was cool again.  I reached for my crown and starting wearing it proudly.  Then there were other times I felt undeserving of the crown upon my head.  I would respond to a compliment not by simply saying “Thank you”, but by pointing out a flaw in myself.  I wanted to let people know that although my royal blood is evident to others, I doubted it.   I am ready to start wearing my crown at all times, at all functions, and in front of all people.  Are you?

Some of us are afraid to touch it, some of us are intimidated power and responsibility that comes along with it, and some of us don’t feel worthy of wearing it.  We all own one.  Start wearing it!

 

Posted in Morality Series

Layers

In talking to my cousin about life, he loves to say that situations have layers.  I am quick to come to conclusions and make decisions, but he often reminds me of the layers.  I tend to overlook the layers, but I realize that I have them too.

Let me explain what he means by layers.  Layers are those experiences that determine how one reacts to things, people, and situations.  For instance, I will not eat watermelon in public because of the stereotype associated with African Americans  loving watermelon.  I love watermelon, but I will not eat it in public because I have attached a negative image to my eating watermelon. I will turn it down if offered to me even though I really love it.  I’m not quite sure if the stereotype is a negative one, but I still will not be seen in public eating watermelon.  I know it’s silly, but that’s not enough for me to change that behavior.  So if I were turn watermelon down in public and asked why, my cousin would say there are layers to my decision.  Basically, the decision and the reasons behind it are more complex than it appears.

I am generally intolerant of bad behavior.  I do not take into account the “layers” behind the situation.  I am quick to disassociate with a person who I feel has treated me unjustly. There have been several instances of my ending relationships rather abruptly because I don’t feel it important for me to understand the why.  I would rather remove myself from the relationship entirely.  My cousin often reminds me of the layers behind people’s actions.  I’m on the fence on whether or not to take these layers into consideration or not.  I do think it is best to remove yourself from a toxic situation as to not add any negative layers to your own life.

I feel that it is important to acknowledge these layers and not to judge people too harshly.  So if I turn down your watermelon at a public function, don’t take it personally.  There are layers behind that situation.  I’m working on it.

Posted in Morality Series, Uncategorized

Being Humble

It has become evident to me that being humble is quickly fading away.

To many people, being humble is a weakness or a lack of  confidence, but to me it has always meant something different.  One can be humble and confident. The two are not mutually exclusive.  When I think of being humble, I think of being a person who is well aware of their gifts, talents, and accomplishments and also aware of their weaknesses, shortcomings and goals yet to be attained.  Having made significant accomplishments does not mean there is no room to grow or that any shortcoming or weakness should be dismissed or ignored.

I am reminded of an incident in my hometown of a student who was gifted academically and athletically.  The student  earned many scholastic awards and several scholarships for academic and athletic merit.  Unfortunately, that student made a series of poor decisions and was arrested.  Of course the incident received attention on all of the local news outlets as this highly decorated student had fallen victim to the trappings many young people face.  What surprised me was the reaction of the student.  The student did not take ownership of the wrongdoing, but instead reacted with anger towards those who mentioned or passed along news of the arrest.  I am well aware  there is a certain type of person who loves to see the mighty fall from grace, but  the student’s reaction was troubling to me.  I am also well aware that the highly accomplished, gifted, and talented fall victim to the same temptations as everyone else, but those gifts and accomplishments do not excuse or dismiss bad behavior or eliminate the consequences of poor decisions.  The student’s reaction was that of prideful boasting of previous accomplishments and a dismissive wave of the hand to the arrest record. All of this documented on the student’s social media site and quickly spread like wildfire. Certainly one poor decision does not take away all of your accolades, but those accolades should not excuse one from misconduct.

In my opinion, there has been a major shift in values.   With the rise of social media and instant access to almost everything, we have been taught to create a cult of personality with little to no attention paid to maintaining an honorable reputation.

This post was just to vent my personal frustration.  I have no solutions to offer other than to challenge all of us to protect ourselves from valuing the trivial and transient and to place your value in the things that cannot be replaced.

 

Posted in Think About it Thursday, Uncategorized

Change

Change-Sign

Change happens.  There is nothing we can do to stop it.  We can prolong it but, it is  inevitable.  We don’t have to like it but, we must learn to accept it.  It makes some people uncomfortable. Oh well.

I have always been the type of person who accepted change.  I am not normally a combative person.  I do like to challenge things and  I am assertive.  I also know when to pick my battles.  Sometimes it is not worth it to put up a fight just to kick the can down the road.  I like peace and peace comes with acceptance.

In the past year, my life has changed drastically.  For the most part it is good but, there are some things that weren’t so great. Fortunately for me, those bad things were temporary.  Nonetheless, there was nothing I could do to stop it.  I had to work with what I had.  I had to make adjustments and, more importantly, I had to get on with my life.  I had to surrender, embrace the changes, and work through them.  Had I fought it, I would have prolonged the discomfort.  Now it is just a distant memory.  I even laugh about it now.

Life is good and I will continue to give little time to the things I cannot change.

Posted in Write On Wednesday

Write on Wednesday #50: Thank you Georgia Butler!

Today is my 50th Write on Wednesday!  To celebrate this milestone, this prompt is dedicated to my 9th grade English teacher, Georgia Butler.  For many years after graduating from high school and graduating from college with a degree in English, I search for all of my English teachers specifically to tell them how much they inspired me to pursue writing. Ms. Butler left my high school to take a position as a principal in a neighboring town shortly after my 9th grade year.  I lost touch with her and was unable to find her.  About two weeks ago, I ran into her at the grocery store!  She could not believe I recognized her.  It has been 30 years since the last time I saw her but, I recognized her immediately.  I couldn’t wait to tell her what I was doing and that writing and education is still a huge part of my life and that I now work in higher education.

I have always valued education in all forms but, I have a tremendous amount of respect for those who teach our young children.  As with my first Write on Wednesday post I honor a teacher who left a lasting impression on me, but there is also a prompt in line with the them of this post.

 

Today’s Writing Prompt:  Write a Lesson Plan

Teaching takes time, planning, dedication, and effort.  It is not a small feat to create a lesson plan.  Pick any subject you like.  Take into account learning styles, audience, and objectives. This is a great writing exercise to practice something different.  It will work every area of your brain.

Posted in Embracing Vulnerability Series

Control

In my previous post, I ended with how I needed to gain control over my emotions.  I feel that control over my emotions is something I will never have, but I do have control over how I allow my emotions to affect my life.  If you follow my blog and read any number of my posts, you are familiar with my season of unfortunate events.  That time in my life was a period of reflection, introspection, modification, and liberation.  It was a necessity for me to gain control over how I allowed my emotions to affect my life, but I was failing at it.  I looked great and no one could tell that I was going through my emotional turmoil.  Actually, I made it my mission to look my absolute best, have the best attitude, and appear to have my act together.  The more my world fell apart, the more I tried to hide it.  I was doing a great job until my health started be affected.  I was getting sick often, getting various infections, viruses,  and inflammations.  I was not in control of my emotions.  I was still feeling these things, but I wasn’t dealing with them properly.  I was pushing them under layers of stylish clothes, Ruby Woo lipstick, and halo of perfectly coiffed, but gradually thinning hair.  It wasn’t until I got tired of sweeping tumbleweed of my beloved kinky coils off of the floor, that I realized something had to give.  I needed to regain control.

I had to realize that I had to do something about what was happening to me.  There were some things I couldn’t control in my life, but there were also things I could control and that’s where I started.